The Question I Get Asked the Most
One of the questions I get asked the most is “How do you do it all?" First of all, let me dissolve any illusions…I don’t. I make mistakes. I let things fall through the cracks. I forget stuff…this applies to my work-life and my home-life.
Second, when it comes to helping at home, my amazing husband, Jace, does just as much as me if not more than me. I usually get up early, take our two kids, Maison, 5, and Maddox, 2, to school and pick them up at the end of the day. He gets home later, but he stays up and does the dishes at night when I’m too tired to even stand. I do all the laundry, he folds, I put away. We balance it all together, and it works. I would be a mess without him!
Third, I delegate at work. It is hard to relinquish control, and it is even more difficult to help someone else understand how you want things to be done. It takes time, it takes giving grace, it takes hard conversations at times. For me, it’s worth it in the end.
“It is hard to relinquish control, and it is even more difficult to help someone else understand how you want things to be done. It takes time, it takes giving grace, it takes hard conversations at times. For me, it’s worth it in the end.”
There are times I have to work from home because one or both of my kids are out of school and I would say those are my hardest days. Although I’m thankful to be my own boss and stay home when I’m needed…I probably feel more guilty about not being at work now than I ever did before. At home, I want to be 100% present with my sweet kiddos, but deadlines or issues loom at work. I want to dedicate all of my brain power to a task, but I’m sidetracked by my kids asking me to have one more yogurt pop. 😣
On weekends, I do my best to plan things we can look forward to doing together when schedules are clear. My desire is to deeply savor this sweet season while my kids are little and be present in all aspects I can be. We do our best to make bucket lists each season and even if we only get to a portion or maybe at best, half…at least we tried and at least we did something together! Props to all you stay-at-home or work-from-home moms and dads out there who homeschool. You’re probably the people I admire the most in this world. Send any tricks my way!
“My desire is to deeply savor this sweet season while my kids are little and be present in all aspects I can be.”
Some basic things that I do that help me with the never-ending pursuit of the work/life balance:
I prepare everything I need to take with me to school for the kids or to work on the night before. This includes packing my lunch, my kids lunch, laying out clothes, socks, shoes, bags. I try to remember to put them by the door. If I try to do this in the morning, I am a scattered, frazzled mess.
Every morning, I make my bed. This seriously makes so much difference in my feelings about the start of my day. It is also lovely to come home to a made bed at the end of the day. I’m convinced I sleep better if I crawl into a made bed.
Before I start working, I clean up my desk or work area. Put things away, dust, etc. Think of it as “mise en place” for the work day.
I review my to-do list before I check my email. Sometimes my inbox can change the course of my day. I try to stick to my goals, squeezing other people’s priorities in-between or after my tasks.
In the afternoon, I make my to-do list for the next day. It’s usually the last thing I do each day before I leave work to pick up my kids.
I have a snack in my car at pick up. My kids are voraciously hungry at the end of the day. Snacks in the car save me from dealing with cranky kids. I stick to things that are less messy/not sticky: goldfish, skinny pop, or veggie straws are my go-to.
Instant pot. Need I say anything else? This appliance saves my life.
Community. This is a biggie. You, me, we all need “those people” in our life that we can lean on and trust. The ones we can call at 9pm and will come cry with you on your back porch over a glass of wine. Who love on us when we feel down, who call us out when we are jerks, who cheer us on as we work hard to achieve our goals. People who manipulate you, lie to you, or are jealous of you: those people aren’t your friends. Drop em. Invest in those who are true and good to you.
At the end of the day, none of us have it all figured out. Certain seasons in life will be easier, run more smoothly, others will be more challenging. What we all need to hear, including me probably the most, is that not everything will always be easy - but what we dream and work for is worth fighting for.